Friday 16 September 2011

"Cuppa tea anyone?"

This past Wednesday the 14th of September 2011, shall be dubbed ‘The official day of oldness’.

The Background:

My two youngest cousins (who shan't remain nameless), Dylan and Tayla, who are 17 and 15 respectively, were visiting to receive haircuts from my very talented hair-cutter sister Tenille.

After Tenille had removed Dylan’s mullet, we spent an hour discussing the latest iPhone apps, a further 20 minutes was spent teasing me about the face mask I had on and another half an hour about the latest Jersey Shore episode. Once this important discussion was over, the conversation went a little something like this:


Nicole: “What happened with Anastaaaaaaaaaaaasia Dylan!?”


Tenille: “Oh yes Anastaaaaaaaaaaaasia, it sounds far more posh when you say it like that!”


Dylan: “Anastasia? Oh we broke up like 8 months ago.”


Tayla: “Yeah he’s had like 4 girlfriends since then, Priscilla, Alida, Devon and Ivy”


Nicole: “Well it’s obvious where you’re going wrong, you need to start going out with girls with normal names like Sarah or Rachel.”


Dylan: “…….”


Nicole: “Well good to see you’re moving on”


Nicole: “How’s your new job?”


Dylan: “Yeah it’s awesome ey! They hired me with a mullet so I reckon it’s going to be a wicked place to work!”


Nicole: “Yeah totes!!! I bet you’re excited to finally have you license!?”


Dylan: “Haha no one says totes anymore Nicole...Yeah it’s sick ey. When your old boy gets back I need him to help me get a car over from Queensland, this one chews through the tyres ey.”


Nicole: “Oh I’m sure he’d be happy to help you with that……so would anyone like a cuppa tea?”


Dylan: “What are you like 80?!”


Need I say more.

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